Helping Tweens and Teens Build the Confidence They Need

The adolescent years are when kids begin to figure out who they are -- their strengths and challenges, beliefs and values, goals and dreams. They are deciding what they want to study or explore and what kind of people they want to be part of their life. But many young people, tweens and teens, are undermined by a lack of confidence. They may be reluctant to meet new people or try new things. Or perhaps they are afraid to try something again after doing poorly the first time around. They may be caught up in constantly comparing themselves to others, feeling that they never measure up in terms of appearance, achievements or an exciting social life. So, what can we do to help them build the confidence they need?   School psychologist and founder of Life Success for Teens, Natalie Borrell, joins Marti and Erin of Mom Enough to share tips for helping teens feel more confident. She knows that parents can support their teens in building confidence by being the constant (or secure base) in their teen’s life, believing in them, and helping them break down dreams or big goals into manageable short-term steps toward success. Of course, parents can’t do this alone; teens need to have another caring adult pulling for them, whether that’s a grandparent, teacher, coach or some other advocate who cares about them and believes in them. Tune into this thoughtful and encouraging conversation about the small steps you can take to help your teen build the confidence they will need as they navigate the challenging and exciting road toward adulthood.   WHAT WILL YOU DO TO HELP YOUR TEENS GAIN GREATER CONFIDENCE? One helpful way to understand the worries and doubts and lack of confidence that so often undermine your teenager’s lack of confidence is to reflect on your own adolescence. To what extent did you feel confident trying a new activity or meeting a new group of your peers or getting back on your feet after a major mistake or failure? Think of specific situations and try to remember what helped you or hindered you from becoming more confident. What do you wish adults around you had done to support you? How can you use that information to help your tween or teen gain greater confidence? What insights did you get from this Mom Enough conversation with Natalie Borrell?   WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ RECOGNIZING LEARNING DIFFERENCES AND HELPING CHILDREN BUILD ON STRENGTHS AND INTERESTS. Does your child struggle with homework, seem fidgety much of the time, or look dazed when directed to do something? Perhaps you (and your child’s teachers) need help in figuring out the optimal ways your child learns. Granted, some children struggling with schoolwork have a learning disability and need (and have the right to) special intervention. But this Mom Enough guest, Dr. Elaine Fogel Schneider, knows there are individual differences among kids who do not meet criteria for a learning disability but who could benefit from extra support and analysis of the ways they learn best. And that kind of support is likely to help them find the confidence and joy they deserve.   ❉ PROMOTING YOUR CHILD’S MATH SKILLS AND CONFIDENCE: PUTTING MATH IN A POSITIVE LIGHT. Many children develop the idea that math is hard, just too much work and drudgery. And yet, even toddlers are attracted to numbers and have an intuitive sense of the meaning of basic math skills. So how can we sustain that interest in our young children or help our older kids recapture it? Michele Mazzocco has spent her career studying just that and she joins Marti & Erin for an encouraging and interesting di...