The Infertile Midwife – Interview with Sophie Martin

Today Zoe speaks to midwife Sophie Martin. Sophie shares her story of infertility, IVF, and birth.   Infertility and baby loss are never easy but the strength to go through these whilst still being surrounded and caring for mothers and babies as a midwife shows how incredibly self-less, passionate and resilient Sophie is.   KEY TAKEAWAYS   After doing a drama degree and starting a masters Sophie decided she wanted to be a midwife. She completed her masters and got a job as a maternity support worker at the same time which she did for a couple of years before training to be a midwife. After trying for a while to get pregnant Sophie and her husband sought help. When the waiting lists for more investigation into what was happening were awfully long Sophie and her husband went private for a round of IVF. Their first round of IVF was successful and it was with twins, something so magical that Sophie couldn’t believe it was happening to them. Sophie suffered with awful morning sickness, it made her truly sympathise with all the mothers that had told her previously how they were suffering. Sophie struggled mentally through her pregnancy but didn’t feel like she could talk to anyone about it. She felt she was lucky and should be grateful so didn’t feel like she could talk to anyone. At 21 weeks Sophie started bleeding and went to hospital to get checked out. But by day three she started to feel quite unwell and went back to hospital where they found out her cervix had began to open. After a night as an inpatient her waters broke. Sophie knew this was ‘the end’. In a very short amount of time she gave birth to both of her boys. They were both born alive which shocked Sophie but she feels so blessed that they were and that she had that time with them. Sophie and her partner find it really helpful to talk about Cecil and Wilfred. It is extremely hurtful to them if anyone doesn't treat the twins as if they are people. Awareness of how difficult some peoples infertility journeys are is so important. Having awareness of the tragic events that can happen makes us all more compassionate to those around us.   BEST MOMENTS  “I was a woman obsessed with having a baby” “We were happy but we were so cautious and so exhausted by this point because the emotional toll it takes on you is really hard” “When you have been through so much you can only ever think about the worst outcomes” “If we are going to be open about infertility then we have to open about everything”   VALUABLE RESOURCES www.theinfertilemidwife.com www.petalscharity.org www.tommys.org www.arc-uk.org www.sands.org.uk     ABOUT THE GUEST Sophie Martin   Midwife and mother to Cecil and Wilfred, who never made it home.   IG @the.infertile.midwife www.theinfertilemidwife.com www.petalscharity.org www.tommys.org www.arc-uk.org www.sands.org.uk       ABOUT THE HOST Zoe Cresswell Devoted mother of two (and a big hairy dog), UK trained midwife, doula and personal trainer, specialising in pre and postnatal fitness. Zoe was born in the UK and before moving to Dubai in 2013 and worked as a midwife in central London, both in a birth centre and a very busy NHS hospital. Although late to the scene, Zoe is an aspiring athlete having won numerous triathlons and representing Great Britain where she placed within the top 10 on the world stage. With her husband James, the couple will soon be launching their cloth nappy company, Bop & Bee, where they hope to inspire families to swap a few disposable nappies a day for the more planet friendly option of cloth. Zoe’s goal is to share her knowledge and experience, tell real life stories, manage expectations and open up those often difficult conversations. Zoe’s own motherhood journey has been full of twists and turns as she put everything on hold and went through numerous miscarriages and rounds of IVF.   CONTACT DETAILS Instagram : @zoecresswell_me Facebook: Zoe Cresswell LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/zoe-cresswell