91. How to Let Go of Orchestrating Your Kid's Entire Life with Darlynn Childress

If you're anything like our clients, fear is a constant. Fear that you're going to mess up, that your kid will feel something uncomfortable, that other kids will have advantages and yours will be left behind. And while that fear is normal, you can create more challenges if your reaction to it is Social Engineering. This week, I'm joined by Life and Parent Coach Darlynn Childress to talk all about this behavior, and ultimately what you can do bulldoze less and trust yourself more. "Social Engineering" is purposefully orchestrating your child's environment and experiences. (Basically, not just putting up the bumpers on your kid's life, but figuring out who'll be at the bowling alley, what they're going to be wearing, which lane they'll be in...) Bumpers on their own can be helpful — but the increased intensity of Social Engineering results in: "We're not even gonna let our kids bowl unless we know the entire experience is going to work for them." So how do you avoid bulldozing the path you think your kid should or needs to follow (and still feel good about your parenting)? In this episode we explore: Parenting pressure to "do everything right" Why bulldozing even a pristine, perfect path can't guarantee anything for your child Strategies to use if you notice you want to orchestrate everything The antidote to fear How to trust yourself and define your self-worth --- Darlynn Childress is the host of the Become A Calm Mama podcast and founder of the Calm Mama Club. A life and parent coach since 2012, Darlynn spends her days helping moms while raising her teenagers and hanging out with Mr. Childress and their dogs. When she’s not coaching, you can find her reading a book, hiking a hill, lounging on the beach, or binge-watching Netflix. Find her here on Instagram. --- ⁠Join my free parent group⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Apply to work with me⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Follow me on Instagram