97. Navigating Friendships: Middle School Edition

If your Middle Schooler is struggling to find friends, is being isolated from the friends they have, or is in the middle of a friendship transition, this episode is for you. So many of my clients struggle with friendships: Keeping them, finding them, finding the right ones. If your teen doesn't have close friends — if they don't feel like they have a group they belong to — it can be really isolating, and their self-esteem can take a hit. In this episode, we explore exactly why Middle School is such a challenging time for friendships, including important data from multiple studies. And I offer 7 Solutions for you to help your teen respond to those challenges and make friends. So why is Middle School present such challenges for making or keeping friends? Bodies, brains and social skills are all changing, and all at different rates. It can be really challenging for teens to find someone at their similar level. 25% of 5th-8th Graders consider popularity to be more important than friendships, which can really tear friendships apart. Confidence is at a low point in adolescence, with girls' confidence dipping by as much as 30% between ages 8-14. Big emotions at this age, combined with a still-developing prefrontal cortex, can result in some irrational and impulsive behavior — which can affect your teen's ability to make or keep friends. What can you do to help your teen make friends? Help them build social skills (show an interest in others, active listening, being kind) Direct their focus away from themselves and onto others to lower stress and increase their ability to interact and connect Encourage them to pursue their hobbies and interests, which can help them meet like-minded people Help them look outside their immediate social circle — to strike up conversations with new people or get to know their friends' friends Suggest they text or DM people on weekends, to start bridging the gap between being "school friends" and outside-of-school friends Talk to a Guidance Counselor, who has a pulse on the student population and can help make connections Reach out to me! Helping Middle Schoolers feel more confident is one of my specialties, and I have a new program designed specifically to help this age group. --⁠ Join my free parent group⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Apply to work with me⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Follow me on Instagram -- Episode mentioned in today's podcast: 5 Ways to Build Confidence