010 - Saying Sorry Part II

In this second part of a two-part series, we talk all about the sticky parts of saying sorry. These things can make us feel uncomfortable, but they're reality, so we need to discuss them. We can help our daughters know how to cope with the difficult parts of apologizing.    What to do when your apology isn't accepted Don't take your apology back Don't get defensive Give them space Show you're sorry with your actions  When saying sorry can backfire   When you don't change They can use your apology against you They might feel pressured to forgive before they're ready They might lose respect for you How to live without over apologizing. Re-phrase instead of saying sorry (i.e. Thanks for being patient) Know what you should and shouldn't apologize for Don't apologize for who you are - if you've given conscious thought, you don't need to apologize for what you think or do.  RESOURCES: Dr Allison, What to Do When Someone Doesn't Accept Your Apology, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7oh3yGV9B50 Elizabeth Scott, MS, Why It's Important to Apologize, https://www.verywellmind.com/the-importance-of-apologizing-3144986 Leon Seltzer, MD, What Can Go Wrong When You Say You're Sorry, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-the-self/202002/apologizing-what-can-go-wrong-when-you-say-you-re-sorry John Hall, Stop Saying Sorry, https://www.cnbc.com/2019/04/16/saying-im-sorry-can-make-people-think-poorly-of-you-research-heres-what-successful-people-do-instead.html Gili Freedman, Erin M. Burgoon, Jason D. Ferrell, James W. Pennebaker, Jennifer S. Beer, When Saying Sorry May Not Help, https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2017.01375/full Megan Olcholski, No Apology Living, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NchKTTN-Hg8